


Screaming His Name

by TheDarkestSunrise



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-06
Updated: 2016-03-06
Packaged: 2018-05-25 02:32:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,665
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6176740
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheDarkestSunrise/pseuds/TheDarkestSunrise
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jordan faces the Beast for the final battle. In the meantime, the voices in Lydia's head get louder with every passing minute. They had turned into screams, uncontrollable, un-understandable screams. Except for one thing.<br/>There was one word that she could make out from all the noise in her head.<br/>One name.<br/>All she could do was try to keep herself from screaming the one name she didn't want to scream.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Screaming His Name

**Author's Note:**

> This was something I’ve been wanting to write for a while, but never got around to. This was kind of how I envisioned Marrish in the 5b finale weeks ago, so IT DOESN'T FIT INTO WHAT HAPPENS IN CANON!!! It was just kind of what I want(ed)/hope(d) would happen in the finale. I hope you like it!! Let me know what you think!! :)

 

 

This was it.

They all knew what was about to happen. They just didn't know how it was going to end. 

Jordan tried to swallow down the lump in his throat, but he couldn't get rid of it. He balled his hands into fists so the others couldn't see them shaking. He knew what he was supposed to do. He'd known it for a long time, even tried it before, but he was never strong enough. But maybe he was this time. The Argents got him in touch with his Hellhound side, he gained control over it. Sometimes...

He just hoped he could control it enough to do what he was here for.

He was going to fight the Beast.

He was going to stop it.

He was going to save Beacon Hills from his monster, save the teenager beneath the wolf and put an end to this seemingly everlasting nightmare.

 Or at least that's what Jordan kept telling himself...

If he were completely honest with himself, Jordan would like to just run away in this very moment. He'd like to abandon all his beliefs of helping people, he would think of himself instead of helping others. But if he were completely honest with himself, he also knew that he would never do that.

Stiles had come up with a plan to trap the Beast in an abandoned warehouse a few miles outside of town. With the help of the rest of the pack, they somehow succeeded in capturing the monstrosity. Part one of the plan, check.

And now it was up to him to end it.

Kira had already given them green light to go in. She and Malia had made sure that no innocent people were around, just in case something went wrong. At the same time, Stiles and Liam were checking the building to make sure there was only one way in. They were still waiting on a text from Stiles to begin the second part of the plan: stop the Beast.

Jordan heard a phone go off, and he could feel his heart stop for a second  because of the sound. He turned to Scott, who looked up from his phone.

"It's time," he said, giving him a supporting smile. Jordan just nodded and started walking towards the building. He could feel the night's wind blow through his hair. It was a cold night, and Jordan thought about how he should be shivering from the gust of air, seeing how he was only wearing a pair of burnt pants. But it didn't bother him. Hellhound perk, he tells himself.

He did shiver though, just not from the cold.

Jordan was so caught up in his own head that he didn't immediately feel the hand that wrapped around his own. It was only when he felt a slight pinch that he looked to his side, straight into the hazel eyes of the strawberry blonde girl. She gave him an encouraging smile, but he could see the fear that laid behind it.

"You okay?" Lydia asked him.

"Fine," he lied. She tilted her head, something he'd learned she does whenever she catches someone lying.

"Jordan..." she began, but he didn't want to let her finish.

"Lydia, I'm fine! Really", he told her while trying to fake a smile. He knew she'd see right through it. Heck, everyone would see right through it...

"If you say so..." the girl said, turning away from him. Jordan side-eyed her, a sense of guilt engulfing him. He felt as if he needed to tell her how he felt. How scared he was of what was about to come. How he didn't know what was going to happen, or if he even stood a chance against this Beast. He also wanted to tell her other things, things that had nothing to do with the upcoming fight, but had everything to do with the two of them. There were so many things that he wanted to tell her, just in case he didn't---

 He felt her fingers intertwine with his, and the small gesture pulled him out of his mind and back to reality. He turned to her, but quickly looked down at their intertwined fingers, and a voice in the back of his head told him how perfectly her hand fitted in his. That same voice also told him to never let go. To keep holding her hand, to drag her away from the danger that laid ahead of them.

Neither of them said anything as they approached the building. Jordan paused for a moment, trying to slow down his heart beat - it was no use - and slowly let go of Lydia's hand. He could feel her eyes pierce into his back while he forced the door open and went in first.

As soon as they entered the warehouse, they could hear the Beast go berserk on one of the lower levels. Jordan wondered if it were possible for a heart to beat so fast that it would burst out of his chest. He felt Lydia brush against his arm, and he knew that she had to get out of here before something bad happened to her. Or to anyone else for that matter. He was about to say something when they could hear something collapse. They could feel the entire building shake, and Jordan was about 90% sure the Beast just tore down a wall. What he was 100% sure about, was that he couldn't wait any longer. He had to go down there and face this creature. Jordan took a deep breath, mentally prepared himself for what was to come, and turned around to Scott and Lydia.

"You need to leave," he told them. Lydia just shook her head.

"I'm not leaving you here on your own!"

"Lydia, please-"

"I can help you!" she insisted. "The Argents told me I can!"

"What are you going to do?", Jordan asked her.

"I will-- I will just--," Lydia stuttered. "I can just take him down with my voice!"

"And what if that doesn't work? You don't heal the way I do. And even I have a hard time healing from that thing's wounds."

"That doesn't matter," Lydia said. "I'm not letting you go up against that thing on your own!"

Something inside Jordan knew that the girl in front of him wasn't going to change her mind. He knew how stubborn she could be. That was probably one of the reasons he--- Jordan quickly got rid of that thought. He can't think about that. Not now. But he knew he had to get her out of here. So while Lydia started listing all the ways she could help ("I can distract him so you can attack him from behind, or I can try shattering its skull like I did with Valack"), Jordan looked at Scott. He gave the Alpha a meaningful look, and when Scott replied with a short nod, Jordan knew that he had understood him.

"Lydia..." Jordan interrupted the girl. "I know that you want to help, I really do, but it's just too-"

"If you tell me it's too dangerous one more time, Deputy, I swear-"

She didn't get to finish her sentence. Scott grabbed her around her waist, her arms trapped underneath his as he started to carry her out of the building.

"What the- SCOTT, LET ME GO!" Lydia started trashing in his arms, trying to break free, but it was no use. "LET GO OF ME!" she shouted again, but the Alpha didn't listen.

While Scott carried her outside, Lydia looked back at Jordan. His eyes were fixated on her face, his lips curled into a sad smile, as if he wanted to tell her that everything was going to be alright. But Lydia could also see the fear in his eyes, fear of this whole plan ending badly.

And right before Scott carried her around the corner, she could see Jordan's eyes start to glow orange as flames started to erupt from his skin. And then he was out of sight.

Scott didn't let go of her once they were outside, and Lydia made another attempt at breaking free from his arms. 

"SCOTT, PUT ME DOWN! I NEED TO HELP HIM!" she shouted  "HE CAN'T DO THIS ALONE!" Scott didn't say anything while he carried her over the warehouse's parking lot. "SCOTT, I SWEAR, I WILL SCREAM!"

"Lydia," Scott began, while trying to keep the girl from escaping, "There's nothing we can do against the Beast. If we stay in there, it'd just kill us. And I'm not letting anyone else die."

"AND WHAT ABOUT JORDAN? YOU'RE LETTING HIM FIGHT THAT THING BY HIMSELF? WHAT IF HE DIES?"

Scott didn't answer her question.

"HE NEEDS ME!" Lydia shouted, and she could feel tears starting to well up in her eyes. She had a bad feeling about this. A Banshee feeling. She knew that those feelings, those predictions, didn't always came true, but what if it did? What if Jordan-

Her thoughts were interrupted by the sound of a sputtering engine. Lydia looked up and saw Stiles' Jeep approaching, stopping right in front of her and Scott.

"Get in!" Stiles shouted while Malia opened the car door.

"I'm not getting in that car!" Lydia yelled.

"Yes, you are," Scott said while he put her down and pushed her towards the car, but before he could get the girl into the car, a howl filled the night.

The pack froze and looked back at the warehouse. Growls were emerging from the building, things were breaking, and they all knew the fight had begun.

Lydia made another attempt to flee, but failed when Scott put his arms around her again, preventing her from running off.

"Scott, get her in the car!" Malia shouted from the backseat, and the Alpha started to once again push the girl towards the car, when they suddenly heard glass breaking.

Lydia forced herself out of Scott's embrace just enough to see what had happened. It was as if she only saw pictures of the scene that played out in front of her.

The broken window.

The shards of glass.

The man lying on the ground.

The flames on his skin slowly disappearing.

For a second, Lydia felt Scott's grip loosen just enough for her to break free and start run towards the man. But Scott was too fast, and quickly stopped her from getting any closer to the fight.

"JORDAN!!" Lydia yelled from his arms, but the Hellhound was too focused on the fight to hear her. He got up, and immediately ran back inside the building, trying to do what he was destined to do. Determined to keep everyone else safe.

"Scott, get her in the freaking car!!" Stiles shouted, and this time, Lydia didn't put up a fight as Scott put her down next to Kira on the backseat of the Jeep. She didn't know what it was, but something inside her broke. Lydia's heart had dropped at the sight of Jordan lying on the ground, already bruised, beaten, scratches all over him. As Stiles pushed the gas pedal to get them out of there, Lydia looked back at the warehouse through the car's window, silent tears streaming down her face as she heard the loud growls coming from the building, and the voices in her head started to whisper.

And she knew what broke her.

She knew that this wasn't a winning fight.

And she knew that there was nothing she could do.

 

***

 

They'd been driving in silence for about twenty minutes, and all the time, the eerie feeling that something horrible was going to happen was building up inside of Lydia. She didn't want to give in to it, though. The tears were still running down her cheeks, and the voices in her head had gotten louder with every passing minute. They had turned into screams, uncontrollable, un-understandable screams. Except for one thing.

There was one word that she could make out from all the noise in her head. One name. She wanted to scream, wanted the voices in her head to go quiet. But she also didn't want to scream, because she knew what that meant. She covered her ears, crunched her teeth, closed her eyes, all to keep herself from screaming the one name she didn't want to scream.

"Lydia?" Kira asked, carefully placing a hand on her shoulder. "Lydia, are you okay?"

She shook her head. She wasn't okay. She was in physical pain from the one name repeating over and over again in her head. She felt as if she was going to be sick, a bitter taste in her mouth.

"Stop the car," she whispered, barely audible, her hand already on the door handle.

"Stop the car!" Kira told Stiles. The boy quickly looked over his shoulder before fixating his eyes on the road again.

"What?" he asked.

"Stop the car!!" Kira yelled, and Stiles hit the brakes. The Jeep hadn't come to a full stop yet when Lydia opened the door and got out of the car. She stumble down the road a couple of feet, before falling down on her knees. She clenched her hands over her ears, tried to make the voices in her head stop. Tried so desperately not to scream, but she couldn't take it anymore. She took a deep breath, and screamed.

"JORDAAAAAAAAAN!!!!!!!!!"

The name echoed through the night, and after that... Nothing. The voices in Lydia's head had stopped. The silence hit her so hard. The tears came faster now, and she felt herself break down in the middle of the road. She remembered the last time she screamed someone's name like this. Allison's name. And she remembered really well what had happened to her.

_No_ , she thought, her own voice the only voice in her head at the moment. _No. It's not- He can't be- He's not--_   She couldn't bring herself to think the word. She already felt it, and that was more than she ever wanted.

She felt someone put their arms around her and lift her up from the ground, but she didn't register who it is. It didn't matter. She knew that, once again, she'd lost someone she cares about. Someone she loves.

Nothing mattered anymore.

 

***

 

Lydia jerks up in her bed. She doesn't remember getting home, she doesn't remember getting into bed and falling asleep.

She remembers screaming.

For a second she thinks it was all a nightmare. She _hopes_ it was all a nightmare. But her throat feels raw, and she knows that it was real.

Now that she's up, everything comes back to her: Jordan telling her to leave, Scott dragging her out, her screaming his name. She can still hear her own voice echoing in her head. She slowly gets out of bed and walks to the window to open the curtains. It's already late morning, early midday. Everything looked normal outside. Peaceful. As if nothing happened. As if Jordan didn't just-

The tears begin to run from her eyes again, and Lydia takes a deep breath, trying to calm herself down. It doesn't work. She leaves her room, makes her way down the stairs. Numb. She aimlessly stands still for a moment, not sure of what to do or where to go, until she hears voices coming from the kitchen. If she's really honest, she doesn't want to see anyone. Wants to be alone until the pain has subsided enough for her to be around other people again. But she goes to the kitchen anyway.

"-just wanted to thank you for bringing her home again," Lydia hears her mother say.

"No problem."

Lydia turns around the corner and sees Malia sitting on the kitchen counter, sipping something from a mug. Both her mother and the Werecoyote look up when she enters the room.

"Lydia..." her mother begins, and Lydia can already hear the sadness in her voice. She probably heard what happened. She probably also knows what her scream meant. Malia hops off the counter and goes over to Lydia.

"Are you okay?" she asks.

"What happened?" Lydia asks, ignoring the question. Her voice sounds hoarse and her throat hurts when she speaks. A grim reminder of last night. Malia quickly makes eye contact with Natalie.

"Maybe you should eat something first," her mother suggests, but Lydia doesn't want to hear it. She couldn't keep anything down anyway.

"What happened?" she repeats, her voice a bit louder now. She might not want to hear the answer, but she needs to know.

"They went back to the warehouse this morning," Malia begins. "Scott, Stiles... The Sheriff. The building was destroyed. Completely in ruins. Stilinski called in a team to clean up the mess, and-" She pauses.

"And?" Lydia urges her to continue.

"They found a body," Malia finally says.

Lydia knew that it was coming, but she still felt as if the earth had disappeared underneath her feet. There was still a part of her had hoped that she'd been wrong. That she'd screamed for nothing. That was wishful thinking.

"Who- Who was-" She couldn't finish her question. A lump had formed in her throat, making it hard for her to breathe.  "Who-" she tries again.

"It wasn't Parrish," Malia says, answering the question Lydia couldn't ask. Lydia looks up in surprise, a flicker of hope lighting up inside her. "It was the Beast. Well... the person underneath the Beast. None of us knew him, but he went to school with us. Turns out we couldn't save him after all..."

"And Jordan?" Lydia asks, her voice only a whisper. She's scared to hear the answer. To hear Malia say that there was another body. That this _was_ someone they knew. But...

"No one's seen him."

The flicker inside Lydia grew stronger, and she had to suppress a soft smile. There was still a chance that he was okay. That he'd come walking through the door to see if she was alright, like he'd done so many times before.

"Lydia," Malia brought her back, putting a hand on her shoulder, "I just think- Just... Don't get your hopes up."

"Yeah, I know..." Lydia says.

"You screamed his name last night, remember... You did so when Allison-" Her voice fades off, not wanting to bring back those memories. "Just... Don't get your hopes up."

Lydia nods, knowing very well that it's already too late for that. Her hopes are up. He might still be alive. _He might still be alive_ , she tells herself. She starts shaking at the thought of it, the possibility of seeing him again. _But you screamed his name_ , a voice in her head tells her. _That doesn't mean anything_ , another voice disagrees. _It did with Allison_.

She realises she's not shaking with anticipation anymore. She's shaking with fear. She's been through all of this before, lost someone she truly cares about before. And she just let herself get her hopes up.

"Lydia?" Natalie asks. "Honey, are you okay?"

Lydia just shakes her head, unable to speak. She starts to feel lightheaded. She's glad Malia is there to steady her, 'cause she feels like she's going to pass out.

"Lydia?" Malia tries to get her to snap out of it. "Lydia!"

Lydia looks up, eyes wide, silent tears rolling down her face as she locks eyes with Malia.

"He's not alright, is he?" she whispers, dreading the answer.

It takes Malia a moment too long to reply. "We don't know that yet. There are people out there looking for him."

Lydia nods, tries to believe what her friend is saying, but that's very hard to do when the look in Malia's eyes betrays that she doesn't believe what she's saying herself.

"Come on, I'm taking you back to your bed. You need to rest," Malia says while putting an arm around Lydia's shoulders and guiding her out of the kitchen. Lydia just nods, not strong enough to refuse.

 

***

 

It's already dark outside when she wakes up. After Malia left, Lydia had started crying, a never-ending stream of tears making their way down her face, staining her pillow. At one point, she must've fallen asleep. A restless sleep, though. She kept dreaming about the fight, seeing Jordan being thrown through a window, seeing his skin being clawed open and his bones broken by the Beast's power, hearing herself scream his name. Seeing him-

She needs to get out of here. This room is making her go insane. _Maybe you already are_ , the voice in her head says. She shakes her head to get rid of that idea, and goes downstairs. She passes her mother in the living room, and makes her way to the door.

"Lydia!"

Lydia turns around to her mother.

"Where are you going?"

"I don't know, Mom," she tells her. "I just need to get some fresh air, okay."

"Okay..." Natalie says. "Just be careful."

"Why?" Lydia begins, her voice filled with sadness. "The Beast is gone... There's nothing to be scared of anymore..." And with that she pulled the door open and stepped into the cold night.

 

***

 

She'd been walking for a while now, not really knowing where she was going. She just went where her feet took her. The cold air helped clear her head a bit, but not enough to get her mind off of what happened.

A gust of wind blows through the night and makes Lydia shiver. She wraps her arms around herself, and somehow it makes her feel better. It gives her the feeling of not being alone, as if there's someone with her that keeps her from falling apart over and over again. That keeps her warm.

She stops walking, and thinks back to Jordan. He'd always been warmer that a human being normally is, and although she couldn't prove it, Lydia'd always thought it was because he spent a lot of his time being on fire. She thinks back to all of the times she's slide a little closer to him when she was cold, and to that one time where he'd held her hands to warm them. Lydia can feel a lump form in her throat again, and bites back tears. She looks around, trying to find something where she can sit down, but there's nowhere to sit. There's nothing around at all.

Lydia's standing in the middle of an abandoned road, one that seemingly runs through the Preserve, trees on both sides of the road. For a moment she wonders how she ended up here, but she realises that it doesn't matter. She starts to walk away, wanting to go home, when she hears something. She stops and looks around to see where the sound came from, but when she doesn't see anything abnormal, she shrugs, thinking she imagined it. She begins to walk again, and doesn't get to take five steps before she hears the noise again.

She's positive she didn't imagine it this time, and looks around to find the source of the noise. After a few seconds, she hears the noise again. The rustling of someone walking through fallen leaves. She turns to where the sound came from, and she can see a figure makes its way through the trees, towards her. Instinctively she backs away. She's been attacked too many times to not be wary of things like this. The figure keeps coming closer to her, and Lydia gets the urge to scream, even though she very well knows that no one would hear her here. And the moment she takes a deep breath, ready to scream, the figure stumbles out from the shadows of the trees.

He's holding himself up against a tree, clearly too weak to stand on his own. His skin has been clawed open, he's burnt in multiple places, and he's covered in blood, but it's him.

"Jordan?" Lydia's voice is just a weak whisper, filled with shock and disbelief. Her feet are nailed to the ground. Jordan looks up, but it's as if he looks right through her. He pushes himself off of the tree and makes his way over to her, wavering as he tries to walk without any support. He can take about three steps before his feet slip out from underneath him. Lydia lunges forward and is just in time to catch him before he hits the ground. She's not strong enough to carry his weight on her own, though, and slowly lets him sink to the ground, sitting down on her knees herself. She gently cups his face, thinking it might all just be a dream and that he will disappear again if she's not careful enough. She brushes his dirty wet hair out of his face, and he looks up at her. Blinks a few times, as if he has a hard time focusing on her.

"Lydia?" he eventually asks quietly, as if he can't believe she's actually there. Lydia nods, her eyes filling up with tears. Not the sad ones that she's been crying on and off for the past hours, but tears that run over with happiness. Jordan notices it, and tenderly places a hand on her cheek. The first tear falls from Lydia's eye the moment Jordan's hand touches her cheek. He frowns.

"Are you okay?" Jordan asks, the worry in his voice obvious. Lydia laughs at his stupid question. _He just almost died and he's asking me if I'm okay?_ More tears fall from her eyes as she wraps her arms around his neck, pulling him into a tight embrace. It's not long before Jordan returns the gesture.

"I am now," she quietly whispers.

They stay like that for a while, both taking in the other's presence, until Jordan breaks the silence.

"What happened?" he asks.

Lydia reluctantly pulls back from the embrace so she can look at him. "You don't remember?"

"I, uhm... I think I passed out a couple of times..." he tells her, his forehead creased while he tries to recall the recent events.

"You fought the Beast," she explains, before her voice turns back into a whisper. "I thought you were dead."

"Why?"

"I screamed your name. And the last time I did that Allison died, so I thought-"

"Hey, I'm alright," Jordan reassures her. He smiles at her, but cringes from the effort. "Ok, maybe 'alright' is a bit too strong. But I'll be fine."

"Are you?" Lydia asks, tears still sliding down her cheeks. Jordan gently wipes one away with his thumb and nods.

"Yeah, I'm going to be okay." He smiles again, his eyes never leaving hers. Lydia smiles back at him through her tears.

"What are you even doing here?" he asks her.

"I'm not sure," she tells him. "I just ended up here. She shrugs, and jokingly adds "I guess I was kinda drawn here."

Jordan frowns at her reply. "What does that even-", he begins, but Lydia interrupts him midsentence by pressing her lips against his. It takes him a second to get over the initial shock of Lydia Martin kissing him before he returns the kiss, and when she pulls away, he wished that she wouldn't have.

"Why did you do that?" he asks her, his voice just loud enough for her to hear. Lydia bites her lip.

"Because I wanted to," she says. "For a while now." She can feel her cheeks start to burn. "And because I thought that you were dead, so I thought that-" She can't finish her sentence, because this time, the Deputy presses his lips against hers. She eagerly returns the kiss, and can't help but smile against his lips when Jordan cups her face.

And just like that, Lydia forgets everything that's happened. She never left him alone in the warehouse, she never screamed his name, she never believed that he was dead. He's alive. He's going to be okay. He's here with her. That's all she knows now.

 

And that's all she needs to know.

 


End file.
